Wednesday, February 24, 2010

24.01.10 - Music

Assalamu'alaykum wrth.

Music... Do we really need music in our life to spice up or to motivate us? Or to drown ourselves in sorrow and anger into music? Peoples said before: Music is my life. Music connects with me coz it shows how i feel. And sometimes people use music for the good use, to attract youths to mosque and the westerners use music to get people to donate them with heart-warming songs.

Here's how i started listening to music. At the age of 13 & 14 i started to hear radio 98.7fm everynight before i doze off to sleep. Listening to all diff genre of english songs. Then at the age of 15 onwards, i stop listening for a while and switch to nasyid songs. Then i realised nasyid has changed. It became more modernise and started to follow western stlye. Sometimes the lirik has syirik in it. That's nasyeed in asia. So i stopped listening all songs for a year. At 17, i started to listen al-quran, try to memorize a few surahs. So, i didn't know anything the western or nasyeed songs. I didn't care what's the new songs, new singers in the song charts.

At 17 years old, i had started working then. Then i meet him, that's Abang Saiful. So after a few months, i realised he listens to western songs too which i would i have never expected he would. So, i thought well its ok to listen to westerns song but i'm not engrossed into it. I don't go and find what's the update for new songs in internet or radio. I only stumble to these songs in facebook and some bloggers.

Now, eventhough i seldom listens to western songs. But i'm afraid it's getting to me. Meaning, i'm afraid that i would find comfort in music to ease my sorrow and to stop thinking about problems for a while.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

23.02.10

Assalamu'alaikum wrth to my blog...

Now i'm in diploma it's getting more challenging. I cannot slack before this in pra-diploma. It's tougher now, the subjects getting more confusing with the arabic language getting intricate to understand. With the large no. of students in the class. More competition.. Alot of tribulations trying to test me...

U know sometimes i've heard couple of times or people telling me i'm like 'ustazah'.
'Oh.. u're not from madrasah? U look like one. U have the appearance of ustazah...'
'The first time i enter the school adawiyah and suhana faces have 'nur' on ur face.'
'What's makes u want to switch to full time religious classes? I really do respect u. U seem to know better than us.'

I felt deeply humble by their comments. Most of the time i felt that i''m in no position to received that honor and respect. Coz i know myself well... i know i'm not that person which they thought i was. Sometimes, by their comments and praises, makes me really trying hard to be that person eventhough i wasn't. And it's difficult to meet their standards.

For example, everytime i do my presentation, i have to put more effort than the rest. I try to find new information that they never thought of. Coz, i don't want to disappointment the ustazah and the people who look up to me as their mentors. But it's tiring emotionally.

U know, sometimes the class is getting rowdy, noisy. I try to find quiet and solitude places where i could think deeply or critical thinking. but i'll try to avoid being alone sometimes. When tamadun lesson, i gave them points that are related. What has jahiliyyah ignorance al-fath:26 got to the with 'rebutan kuasa dan pengaruh'? All these informations are inside the book. U guys have to read the book, eventhough the ustadz summaries them in slides.

But at times, i felt disappointed with myself. Coz, the books i've read, the lectures i've heard either from the internet or from my ustadz/ustazah i'd forgotten. I know I've heard it before which i could use it as point. It's such a waste! Mad about it myself...

It's been 1 year ustadz husny didn't teach pra-dip4. Now when he's back only to teach us 1 module, Mustolah hadith, i'm just really amaze by his great knowledge about hadith. I really respect him alot. I'm always looking forward to his lessons. He makes us feel and understand the importance of Islam. What's so great about Islam? Why should we be proud to learn deeply about Islam? Alot of what he said, it's not from his nafs, from quran and hadith. When he speaks, he speaks with wisdom. Some students thinks his tone of his voice making them boring or the way he teaches. But as time went by, the students that used to say that, now are awed by his speech, his wide knowledge. He knows mostly of the books that imam-imam had wrote because he likes to read alot and he's excellent in arabic even one of the syeikh from university of madinah was amaze by his work in arabic. His syeikh was surprised that a great work came from a country where arabic is not widely used and spoken. It's hard to find a great ustadz like him. MasyaAllah! May Allah bless him and forgive his sins and make him the people from jannah. Ameen!

Be continued....

Monday, February 15, 2010

In the Name of Allah

Poem written by : Velma Cook

In the name of Allah we are born
In His name we live
and in His name we die

Our shadows prostrate to their Creator morning and evening
without our consent
Birds and animals usher in the times of prayer

Birds circumambulate the Ka'ba
while migrating birds stretch forth their... wings
finding their way by Allah's Mercy

Only to feel unrest and leave once more
ever-searching, traveling discontent until they die

We, also wander
some blindly
while others see

The Climb

I can almost see it
That dream I'm dreaming but
There's a voice inside my head sayin,
You'll never reach it,
Every step I'm taking,
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking but I
Got to keep trying
Got to keep my head held high

There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes you going to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what?s waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing,
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes they knock me down but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm going to remember most yeah
Just got to keep going
And I,
I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

He's Back! His lecture is Super Duper Awesome!

Assalamu'alaikum wrth..

Alhamdulillah... It was monday on the 1st feb and i'm already gearing up for school. Yeay!

Ustadz Husny is teaching my class well actually 2 classes, K8 & K9, subject on Mustolah Hadith. Yippeee....!! I was very delighted and also relieved that ustad amin did not teach us any subject for this semester. :) Phew.. if not, we won't benefit anything from him only a few things or so which is not related to the topic. :|

I really can't wait what story he's going to share, especially, abt our Prophet s.a.w and his sahabas r.ahm. :)

However, the sitting arrangement and the students, is making me difficult to hear or concentrate on what Ustd is lecturing. I'm sitting at the far right corner which i barely can hear, and what's making it worse the girls behind couldn't stop talking! Aiyoooo..... What's wrong with them? Don't they know there inside a class not at macdonalds???

Haizzz.... It was a just a disappointment to me for what i hope or looking forward to it turns out differently.

However, the next day, I was able to sit in the front row although i was sitting near the wall. But Alhamdulillah... i finally can hear what Ustd is saying. I couldn't jot down everything he says.. coz there's many, many things he had said. I wish i could have record it and hear it over and over again in mp3/4. I don't even have mp3. Not even my hp. That hp gives me a lot of trouble. InsyaAllah, i will intend to buy mp3 in the near future. ;)

one less lonely girl

There's gonna be one less lonely girl
One less lonely girl

How many I told you's
And start overs and shoulders
Have you cried on before
How many promises be honest girl
How many tears you let hit the floor
How many bags you'd packed
Just to take'em back, tell me that
How many either or's
But no more,
If you let me inside of your world
There'll be one less lonely girl

Oh oh
I saw so many pretty faces
Before I saw you, you
Now all I see is you
I'm coming for you
Don't need these other pretty faces
Like I need you
And when your mine in the world

There's gonna be one less lonely girl
I'm gonna put you first
I'll show you what you're worth
If you let me inside your world
There's gonna be one less lonely girl

Christmas wasn't merry, 14th of February
Not one of'em spent with you
How many dinner dates, set dinner plates
And he didn't even touch his food
How many torn photographs I saw you taping back
Tell me that you couldn't see an open door
But no more,
If you let me inside of your world
There'll be one less lonely girl

Oh oh
I saw so many pretty faces
Before I saw you, you
Now all I see is you
I'm coming for you
Don't need these other pretty faces
Like I need you
And when your mine in this world

I can fix up your broken heart
I can give you a brand new start
I can make you believe
I just wanna set one girl free to fall (free to fall)
She's free to fall (fall in love)
With me
My hearts locked and nowhere that I got the key
I'll take her and leave the world
With one less lonely girl